Sharing Your Oreos - Nellita Young

I had a good laugh the other day while watching a clip of a video by the comedienne Chonda Pierce.  She was talking about trying to lose weight and said that she had even gone so far as to buy a new workout tape.  However, she added, “Every time I put the tape in, I GAIN four pounds!”  (Much laughter ensued.)  Then she explained, “I put the tape in the TV, sit on the couch, open up a big bag of Oreos, and yell, ‘Go, Jane!  Go, Jane! Go, Jane!’”  Sadly, I can relate!!

However, even though Chonda was relating something about her physical life, her story seems to parallel the spiritual lives of many of us.  Our churches are literally FILLED with those of us ladies who have been believers for years, seldom missing a Sunday School class, a ladies’ retreat, or a Bible study opportunity.  In fact, most of us have enrolled in every Bible study that Beth Moore, Kay Arthur, Phyllis Shirer, and many others, have ever written.  Yet, we tend to sit in our pews week after week shouting, “Go, Beth!  Go Kay!  Go Phyllis!”   We have become content putting in the tapes, then sitting comfortably while we reach into our bags of spiritual snacks, feeding ourselves, and cheering others on to do the work for us.  In so doing, many of us have become spiritually sluggish and are weighted down with a few extra pounds of apathy. 

Lest you think I am beginning to sound like Jillian Michaels (“The Biggest Loser”) -- criticizing weaknesses and pointing out faults -- I can assure you that I am not.  It is just time for us to take that wonderful knowledge that we have gleaned from all those studies as well as from years of experience and begin pouring it into the lives of others.  It is time to start sharing that bag of “Oreos”!!!  There is just a great need for our ladies to mentor other young members in the faith who may need our godly support and guidance. 

Titus 2:3 (NIV) says, “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, ... . “  Verse 4 then follows with … “Then they can train the younger women … .”  Now, I will admit that most of us would resent someone approaching us and asking, “Would you like for me to give you a little advice on  …  how to raise your children, how you ought to be dressing or acting or treating your spouse.”  However, deep within, I think most of us truly desire to grow in the Lord and we want to be the best mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend, neighbor, co-worker that we can be!   So … how do we accomplish this scriptural mandate without becoming offensive in our approach?  I think a key lies in verse 3 of Titus 2 when it says “… in the way they live.”  In other words, much of this is connected to building relationships with others. You can bet that even though others may not ask for our advice, they are more than likely watching how we live our lives!

So how DO we accomplish this?  One way is to begin building relationships with others in our church and in our community.  You may notice a younger woman who could really benefit from having a couple of hours off just to run to the grocery store.  Maybe you could offer to baby sit for her every so often.  Build that relationship!  Share your “Oreos!”  Or perhaps you have some gifts that you could share with others:  couponing, quilting, cooking meals for the month, organizing, making jewelry, scrapbooking, etc.  Maybe you could invite a few ladies over who seem to be interested in what you are skilled in.  Over time you will begin to develop a special relationship where the younger women might eventually feel comfortable in asking you questions in areas where you could give godly advice.  Or how about doing what OUR mothers and grandmothers did … asking someone over to sit on the front porch and swing, sharing a glass of iced tea and a plate of cookies and just chatting!!  You see, you do not have to teach a class or stand on a stage in front of a microphone in order to mentor someone else.  You merely have to be willing to pour your life into theirs.

Now, the sticky point is … who IS considered older and who IS considered younger?  Will all the “older women” please raise your hands??  Ooops!  I don’t see any!!!  If you are like me, there are days that I feel like I am 16 inside and can do ANYTHING, and there are other days that I feel too old to even get out of bed!!  But, I can tell you this … NONE of us “have arrived.”  None of us know it all.  We are older than some ladies, but we are also younger than others.    In other words, we can be trainers to some women, but there are always women stronger in the faith from whom we can learn. 

So … it is time to get up off your pew and ask God to show you how you can share your “bag of Oreos” with others!  Then, LISTEN and be willing and available to do what He tells you to do.  “ … train yourself to be godly.  For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come”  (I Timothy 47b – 8).